See also: History of the Cyber

Pre-Stone Age Edit

First Days of the Cyber

10 000 000 000 BC

-The Cyber is created

-Funwaa and Gumwaa are born, And engage in divine conflict

-The Church of the Dank is created

9 999 999 764 BC -Dr Jhatka kills Adolf Eichmann in the battle of kepler 22b,

Exiling him to the shadow realm until the 1920s

9 999 999 000 BC -After 1000 years of war, Funwaa defeats Gumwaa. Gumwaa continues to resist.

-the Church of Cringe is created

-Funwaa appoints Cybernetic God to govern the Cyber.

200 000 BC -Earth is created by Funwaa

-Many animals evolve, the first being the zebra.

-Human life appears

Early Stone Age Edit

100 000 BC: Weed appears, And is subsequently discovered by Cave Bro, Starting the Stone age

28 000 BC: Life appears in India

25 034 BC : The Ugandan Knuckles finally move from Funwaa and settle in Cybernetic Uganda.

10 000 BC: Earliest theorized dating of The Hand-Drawn Episode

3511 BC: Pickle Rick is sent to kill Lord Terris. He refuses, And both pickle rick and lord terris reignite major resistance against funwaa.

3510 BC: Lord Terris starts the Second Battle of Kepler-22b. Meanwhile, Pickle rick attempts to get the Jews to join the resistance.

3509 BC: The Jews reject, And The Illuminati is founded by Jews who are smart enough to understand Rick and Morty.

3433 BC: Lord Terris dies and the revolt ends.

1100 BC: Veronica, Future Führerin of the Fourth Reich, is supposedly born on Crete.

820 BC: Cybernetic Ancient Sparta is established by Lycurgus of Sparta, Forming the first Fеminazi society.

371 BC: Cybernetic Ancient Sparta is destroyed after the defeat in the Battle of Leuctra.

326 BC: Alexander the Memer invades india

69 AD: People have a mild chuckle because the year is equal to the sex number.

420 AD: First Slavic state created (Cybernetic Russia)

1223 AD: The Mongols invade and immigrate to Russia. They later become russian slaves.

19 Apr 1775: The USA Declares independence, The First American Revolutionary War starts. (details)

3 Mar 1777: The First American Revolutionary War ends in a British victory.

June 18th, 1812: The USA declares independence from britain. Subsequently, the Confederacy declares independence from the USA. A three way war between the USA, the Confederacy and the British empire starts. (details)

2 May 1813: Second American Revolutionary War of Northern Agression in 1812 ends in a British victory.

Unknown: India becomes part of the British Empire.

28 July 1914: World war 1 starts following the Assassination of Franz Ferdinand

7 Nov 1917: Vladimir lenin takes over russia and establishes the Islamic Emirate of Russia (details)

11 Nov 1918: World war 1 ends with a German armistice.

1920 AD: The Islamic Emirate of Russia becomes the Russian free market state. (details)

1922 AD: The Russian free market state becomes the soviet union (details)

8 Nov 1922: After Making some bad Kekistan memes on Reddit, Hitler is banned from f7u12. This causes him to write his Naruto fanfiction, Mein kampf. (details)

c. 1925: Old Bro is born.

1920s: After eons of being in The Void, Adolf Eichmann is released back into the earth. He later joins the SS.

1939: Hitler makes an alliance with Cybernetic Japan to try and overthrow the Pro-Funwaa Illuminati.

1940: Hitler starts his invasion of France. He can not circumvent the Maginot line by invading through Belgium, Because the Maginot line had been extended. Instead, Hitler circumvents the Maginot line by invading through Switzerland, Whose defenses are circumvented with an invasion through Liechtenstein.

1942: Despite initial success, Hitler's invasion of Cybernetic Russia fails when other Funwaa forces launch Operation Sledgehammer in Autumn of 1942, Which forces Hitler on a two-front war.

8 May 1943: Berlin is taken. Cybernetic Japan nonetheless continues to fight.

2 Sep 1945: Operation Downfall succeeds at wiping Cybernetic Japan from the world map.

2 Sep 1945 - 4 Jan 1947: In reprisal to Japan's rebellion, Cybernetic Japan is erased from the world map. Later, The Kuril islands were found to be illegally occupied by Cybernetic Russia and thus were returned to Cybernetic Japan. The Japanese people as well as the emperor have since turned the Kuril islands into their new homeland.

Early 1940's: Sarcastic Grandma gets married with Old Bro

1946: Adolf Eichmann is captured and once again banished to the shadow realm.

26 Jan 1950: India becomes independent

Early 1950s: Sarcastic Grandma births her first child, Sarcastic Auntie.

Mid 1950s: Sarcastic Grandma births her second child, Weed Bro's future mother

1960: Adolf Eichmann is released back into the Cyber. He later joins the USSR.

c. 1965: Sarcastic Grandma births her third child, Weed bro's future father.

Mid 1960s: Sarcastic Bro's mother is born

20 Jan 1969: Richard Nixon declares independence from Britain, Starting the Third American Revolutionary War. (details)

1972: The Great Indian War starts, Creating an independent pakistan

9 Aug 1974: The Third American Revolutionary War ends in a British victory.

1980: Chad Thunderock is elected president of the Chad Republic, Ending the Chadian war of independence.

Early 1980s: Roger the Sniper is born

1980s: Weed bro's parents get an incestuous marriage

c. 1989: John is born.

1 July 1990: East and West Germany are unified into the Fourth Reich. Over the next 20 years, The Fourth Reich takes over much of Europe, Culminating in a "European Union" of 28 formerly independent republics.

17 July 1990: The Gamer Genocide begins.

28 Aug 1991: Tina is born

25 Dec 1991: The Soviet union collapses, Ending the cold war. Subsequently, Russia dissolves into an area of warlords. (details)

1992: Lucy is born

Advanced Stone Age Edit

10 April 1993: Weed Bro and Rockin' Hair Bro are born as twins.

Early 1990s: Sarcastic Bro is born

3 May 1999: Pakistan starts the Kargil war with India. Roger the Sniper participates in it

2000: Chad Thundercock steps down as the President of chad.

2002: The Final Russian warlord surrenders to Vladimir Putin, Ending the Russian Warlord era.

c. 2004: John's Girlfriend is born.

2006: The Council of 300 is formed

Early 2000s: Cold war II starts

Mid/Late 2000s: Munna is born as the child of sarcastic auntie and Abdul khan Mohammed

December 2011: 4chan, Reddit, Tumblr, and Funnyjunk jointly invade 9Gag.

2 Oct 2012: The Russian-Backed Fourth American Revolutionary War starts. (details)

1 Nov 2012: The Fourth American Revolutionary War ends with a peace agreement. The USA will become independent after electing their first president at November 9th, 2012.

9 Nov 2012: The United states of America become independent from the British empire, After electing their first president, Annoying Orange.

Early 2010s: S.C.H.O.O.L is formed. They proceed to fight against India in the S.C.H.O.O.L. Insurgency, In order to try and establish their ideal world which is ruled under Memearchy.

9 Nov 2016: The United states of America elect their second president, Marshmallow.

6 Feb 2017: Adam Ellis joins Buzzfeed.

22 Apr 2017: Sarcastic Bro and Sarcastic Auntie start the Raid on Unnamed Town 1 and are joined by Adam Ellis on their way there. Once they arrive in the city, They realize they forgot what they were supposed to be doing and left.

Early May 2017: Weed Bro gives Tina the Carrot Ring.

19 May 2017: The Roast of Tommy Max occurs.

23 May 2017: Derpina is killed by Roger the Sniper in the Battle of Attur for supposed ties to the RVCJ

23 May 2017: Weed Bro breaks up with Tina.

26 May 2017: Cybernetic India passes a law prohibiting unilateral capital punishment.

1 Jun 2017: The most historic Weed comic ever is believed to occur.

6 Jun 2017: Teacher's daughter is born

10 Jun 2017: Weed bro murders his father (details)

11 Jun 2017: An Ambulance presumably dies

11 Jun 2017: Xander becomes the leader of S.C.H.O.O.L. after the leaders death.

21 Jun 2017: Weed Bro surrenders to Russian Police and is sent to Cybernetic India for trial.

22 Jun 2017: Weed Bro arrives in Cybernetic India. The Trial of Noah Mulugeta begins.

2 Jul 2017: The Trial of Noah Mulugeta ends in a Not Guilty verdict.

3 Aug 2017: The Jabalpur school hostage crisis begins

4 Aug 2017: Battle of Anuppur: Weed Bro and 2 other members of S.C.H.O.O.L. rob a bank

5 Aug 2017: The Jabalpur school hostage crisis ends.

8 Aug 2017: Marshmallow resigns following an Email scandal. Bronald Trump takes his place.

11 Aug 2017: Sarcastic auntie dies due to Alzheimer's disease - She turns into a ghost.

13 Aug 2017: Tommy Max starts his crossing of the Atlantic Ocean.

16 Aug 2017: Weed bro attempts to murder tina. (details)

4 Sep 2017: Faced with a westernizing Pakistan, CSTO invades Pakistan.

9 Sep 2017: Pakistan capitulates. Foreign Dictator Bro is put in charge.

9 Sep 2017: Rockin' hair Bro is arrested by the Ukrainian authorities. Later in the same day, He escapes with the help of the Donetsk People's Republic (details)

10 Sep 2017: Battle of Jaithari: Weed bro has a brief clash with the Indian armed forces.

27 Sep 2017: Maladar Massacre: Weed Bro releases several lions into an innocent populace, Killing 183 people.

16-24 Oct 2017: Eight-Day War: The Gumcels fight a brief war with /r/ComedyCemeteryLore

23 Oct 2017: Weed Bro kills Armless Bro

31 Oct 2017: Prudence dies

2 Nov 2017: Weed Bro's health starts to deteriorate. (details)

14 Nov 20??: Weed Bro's Son is born.

25 Nov 2017: Tina recovers from her coma. (details)

28 Nov 2017: Old Bro tragically passes away from lung cancer.

11 Dec 2017: Weed Bro dies. (details)

12 Dec 2017: Rockin’ Hair Bro and Tina start a relationship together.

14 Dec 2017: Weed Bro’s left hand gains conciousness and crawls off to become the leader of Cybernetic Pakistan.

December 2017: Facebook invades Reddit and establishes the General Government which is ruled by /u/spez. A resistance movement ensues.

1-20 December 2017: War of the Dardanelles: The Fourth Reich conquers Cybernetic Turkey, And subsequently intensifies oppression of Gamers.

January 17th, 2018: Adam Ellis resigned from his job at Buzzfeed.

4-5 Jan 2018: The January 4th incident occurs

6 Jan 2017: Sundar Pichai dies due to seeing a stupid google search.

20 Jan 2018: Xander leaves S.C.H.O.O.L. Genius Bro replaces him and becomes the leader.

30 Mar 2018: The Battle of Boonville occurs between the 4th of January movement and the Cybernetic American Government.

27 Mar - 21 Apr 2018: A group of Gamers rise up against the Fourth Reich in the Gamer uprising. Over the course of 25 days, The Fourth Reich as well as its allies collapse in the face of Gamer advance, Shocking the world. Subsequently, The Fourth Reich is dissolved into 28 independent republics, And the Gamers receive their own independent nation.

6 Apr - 7 May 2018: Natty's Coup: Members of the American Fеminazi Party take control of the Cybernetic American government via a coup d'etat in a bid to destroy the Gamer uprising, starting the Cybernetic American Civil War.

24-28 Apr 2018: The Power vacuum created by the Gamer Uprising allows the Thots organization to take control of parts of the Former fourth reich

1-5 May 2018: Gamer girl invasion: Thots launches a failed attempt to exterminate the Gamer Republic.

13 May 2018: Tommy Max becomes a furry at Flores island, During a brief break of his crossing of the atlantic ocean.

14 May 2018: Battle of Pauradhar: Dr. Jhatka is killed in a failed attempt to reverse the Gamer uprising.

15 May 2018: Battle of the Funwaa base: Pickle Rick launches a daring counterattack and succeeds at ending Funwaa's hegemony over the cyber.

18 Jun 2018: Beloved Rapper and president of the anti domestic abuse and anti homophobia organization Jansen Dwayne Ricardo "XXXTentacion" Onfroy is killed by unidentified men, eerily similar to the murder of anti domestic abuse organization founding member John Lenin.

23 Jun 2018: Tommy Max completes his crossing of the Atlantic Ocean.

26 Jun 2018: The Hand-Drawn Episode is discovered.

7 July 2018: Poop island declares independence.

17 July 2018: The first annual Gamer Genocide Remembrance day is held.

5 Aug 2018: Tina reveals she is pregnant.

13 Aug 2018: Yaoming Mulugeta is born as the child of Tina and Weed Bro, 9 months after his father's death.

9 Sep 2018: Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

19 Sep 2018: The Gamer Republic adopts "Gamers never die" as its anthem.

24 Sep 2018: John presumably murdered an unknown person for unknown reasons with a gunshot.

1 Nov 2018: Cybernetic American Civil War: Ben Shapiro begins his March to the Sea.

14 Nov 2018: Ben Shapiro completes his March to the Sea. As a result, the Gamer Republic, Petoria and S.C.H.O.O.L. declare war on Natty's regime.

31 Dec 2018: Natty is killed by Ben Shapiro, ending the Cybernetic American Civil War and bringing peace to the cyber.

Future events Edit

~2027: Tina gets married to Tommy Max (theoretical, See details)

2060s: Dicky's Grandson is born.

April 30th, 2945: Dr. Jhatka is killed a second time by Jotaro Joestar with the help of God-Emperor Trump. (details) The event was relegated to 1945 due to the Thanos purge.